


Exit Wounds

by Lailaps



Series: Loud Like Love [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Long Live Feedback Comment Project, M/M, Song Lyrics, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-12
Updated: 2017-05-12
Packaged: 2018-10-30 23:04:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10886757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lailaps/pseuds/Lailaps
Summary: Lyrics belong to Placebo, respectively. I couldn't manage to write a single word without them, so a BIG thank you to Placebo!!





	Exit Wounds

**Author's Note:**

> Lyrics belong to Placebo, respectively. I couldn't manage to write a single word without them, so a BIG thank you to Placebo!!

“You always flirt with me, Dean. Why?” Castiel asked frowning. Dean put the gun he was holding on his hands, back to the trunk of his '67 Impala and sighed heavily. He scoffed, slammed the trunk shut and turned around to look at Castiel. “I just... I have someone. I'm involved, you'd say...”

“You? Involved? Please,” Dean scoffed again and rolled his eyes in disbelief. He crossed his arms and grinned. “Well, Castiel. If you're really involved with someone, I think you shouldn't be talking to me about flirting. I'll stop. _If_ you want me to stop.” Castiel shook his head slowly, knowing what a mistake he was making. It didn't matter that his heart was pounding loudly in his ears, and that he knew just how much all of it would hurt Crowley.

It wasn't like he didn't care, Castiel just wondered... What would it be to sleep with someone else? Was sex anything like making love? He played with his thoughts, making himself nervous and sweaty. What was Dean like? Was he so gentle, so caring, so loving and so mellow in bed?

_In the arms of another, who doesn't mean anything to you,  
_ _do you lose yourself in wonder?_

Everything felt almost the same as before. Before the hot, steamy and heart-wrenching sex with Dean. There was only one thing, that had changed. Castiel's conscience wasn't clean, it was smothered with sweat and dirty secrets. That feeling, that Castiel had. He had no name for it. For the pain he was feeling, for that gut-twisting feeling that filled every single nook and cranny of his body.

“Have you ever been... in love, Dean?” Castiel asked so quietly, that the question almost slipped Dean.

“Me? Nah." A lie. Castiel could see right through Dean, but at that moment he couldn't care less.

“So you don't know what's the difference between sex and making love?” Castiel asked, while picking his white dress shirt from the floor of Dean's Impala. Dean sighed and bit his lip.

“Well, as I've heard it... It's different. It feels different.”

“What about if you're having sex with someone else?”

“You mean cheating?”

“Yes.”

“Well then... From personal experience, I'd say that women don't like it. I assume that men don't either. What's up with all these questions?”

“Nothing,” Castiel muttered and pushed the Impala's front door open. “I'm sorry but this can't happen again.” Then he just vanished, leaving behind a whiff of his scent. Dean sighed and stretched himself on the back seats. He looked at the roof of his car he so much loved, and wondered what if... What if Castiel was involved with someone? What would happen to Dean?

One thing was sure, Castiel was no virgin. Not anymore... Dean was fearing for the safety of his ass more than he was concerned about Castiel. He didn't care so much, after all. Yet Castiel thought otherwise.

_And I don't enjoy to watch you crumble  
_ _I don't enjoy watching you cry_

“Nothing, it was nothing. Crowley please, let me explain.”

“Why do I need explaining from _you_? I know what that fucking asshole did. He tricked you into this, didn't he? I will fucking off him. I will rip his dick off, then I will feed it to him. No one touches you, but _me_.”

“Stop it. I was willing. More than I'd like to admit. It was consensual.”

“Heck with it. You don't even understand the most simple things, do you? It hurts. Hurts more than anything I've ever experienced... Nothing is worse than this. You failed me, Castiel. I trusted you and... Did you really say _yes_?”

“Not actually. I kind of, just went with it. I've thought of it before.”

“Who hasn't? It's not like he's not fucking good looking. But you don't act on your needs and wants, not always.”

“I just wanted to know, if it'd be different.”

“Well was it?” Crowley snarled and sank his nails into his palms. Blood was dripping on the floor, making quiet splashes. Castiel nodded. He was repenting and his eyes were burning but Crowley just couldn't understand, his anger and disappointment was clouding his judgement. Maybe he didn't want to, and Castiel feared that it'd be the end of them. End of the things that made him happier than anything else.

Crowley huffed and swallowed. He wiped his eyes and his eyes were burning with wrath. He grabbed Castiel's arm with his left hand and raised his right. He then slapped Castiel across his vessel's face with such force, that his knees gave away. Blood filled Castiel's mouth, but he didn't fight it. He spat a puddle of mixed blood and spit on the floor.

And when he turned his remorseful gaze back towards Crowley, he saw that the demon was actually crying. Tears were flowing down his cheeks, and the air between them was so thick, that it could be cut with a knife.

“I'll kill him,” Crowley cried.

And Castiel said: “You won't.” And, well he was right. Crowley wouldn't do such thing.

But he would later on give Dean a beating, that the hunter wouldn't forget soon.

_I love you more than any man, but I seem to lay it all to waste_

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:
> 
> Feedback
> 
>   * Short comments
>   * Long comments
>   * Questions
>   * Constructive criticism
>   * "<3" as extra kudos
>   * Reader-reader interaction
> 

> 
> [LLF Comment Builder](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/post/170952243543/now-presenting-the-llf-comment-builder-beta)
> 
> I always reply to comments! <3


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